Episode 48

In this episode of Solomon's River,  we find Dr. Scarlett talking with Dr. Turquoise's 140-year-old mother, asking her about her secrets of youth.  Dr. Turquoise arrives with the new "sample" (an unconscious man) to regenerate his Mother, and asks Scarlett to assist.  While conversing, Scarlett discovers that Turquoise and his lab make money through a variety of means, including the selling of plutonium!  


To regenerate his mother, Turquoise takes blood from the "sample" and injects it into his mother. This process is guaranteed to regenerate her by 20 years in fewer than 5 minutes, making her the equivalent of a 120-year-old. In 15 minutes she is 60 years younger! Unfortunately it turns out that the "sample" was apparently brain-deficient, and it is having an adverse effect on Mom!

Meanwhile, in Rajiv's Coffee House, Princess Lakshmi is once again locked in the cellar.  Jervis comes in, toking on a doobie, asking for Rajiv's help; he is concerned about the Bummer Bomber who is running around town blowing things up.  At that moment, Mildred the Mousy Librarian enters, but she has amnesia!!! Jervis recognizes her...she explains a milquetoast man told her they were married and took her to his trailer to have marital relations with her.  Jervis tells her she is not married and shares his ganja with her.  She leaves with him to go to his empty trailer.  Rajiv leaves, dragging a heavy box over the trapdoor.

Across town Magnus is taking a walk, trying to get over the purple decor his granddaughter has saddled him with.  During his walk a "designer" bring over paint samples for Cilantro, including lavender, ochre/orange, and 50 shades of grey for the bedroom.

• Will Dr. Turquoise's mother recover from her treatment?
• Will Mildred the Mousy Librarian recover her memory, or will we be able to milk that storyline for a few episodes?
• What will Rajiv do now that he has Lakshmi in his clutches again?
• Will Magnus go with puce, or mauve?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!

 

Episode 47

Dr. Scarlett and Dr. Turquoise are pondering the missing nurse again when Dr. Turquoise's mutated 140 year old mother enters requesting another treatment--a t-cell grafting from someone fresh and young.  Dr. Scarlett will be along to observe the operation.

Magnus is happy to be alive, but baffled by the newly redecorated castle.  Cilantro and her team have provided a fabulous castle makeover!  Turquoise, trellises and velvet throne/Volkswagen.

As she wanders back through town and the rubble of the library, Princess Lakshmi is simply beside herself with anger that she cannot leave Solomon's River.  A man stands, admiring the destruction.  The princess is even more put out when she realizes she must go back to the only person she knows in town: Rajiv.  She leaves to find the coffeehouse.

Jervis the Janitor, as mellow as can be and sporting his imaginary monkey, also crunches through the rubble and tries to get the vaguely familiar man to imbibe.  Janice White, Detective, comes to interview Jervis.  An assistant sets up a perimeter with yellow "Hazard Zone" tape that will not be used as a tool to add to the plot.  Janice disposes of Jervis' joint and, thusly distracted, the suspicious man is able to sneak away.  Jervis belatedly recognizes the man: the Rude Guy who was talking about bombs... plural!

Meanwhile, as Rajiv looks at his coffeehouse from a different perceptive, Princess Lakshmi reluctantly returns.  Their heated argument about which country has the biggest bomb-wielding idiots turns into a heated lip lock!

• What diabolical doctoring are Drs. Scarlett and Turquoise exploring?
• How far will Cilantro and her team go with their flamboyance?
• Who will stop the Rude Guy with Bombs?  Jervis?  Janice?  Somebody else with a J-name?
• What will become of Rajiv and Princess Lakshmi's sudden passion?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!

Episode 46

Dr. Scarlett and Dr. Turquoise are flummoxed because an island is a limited place and yet they cannot find the nurse.  Nurse, however, is not on the island; she is in a canoe with the well-endowed native, Yoongoong.  He is taking her to a cavern he knows, but now he becomes flummoxed because there is a forcefield over the entrance.  Luckily, Nurse almost went into programming instead of nursing and was able to jimmy the electronics to get inside.  Yoongoong grunts approval.

Magnus still wanders his castle and is surprised by his granddaughter Cilantro, freshly back from college with a degree in interior design.  Cilantro denies she was ever pregnant and reveals that it was her sister, Samantha, who had a baby with Mr. Ylung.  She offers to redecorate his castle and Magnus agrees.  She wants to add...turquoise!

Rajiv is still miserable.  Franny Mason enters in need of a job.  His ex-girlfriend, it turns out, is "pregnant with kids" and now wants child support.  Rajiv hires him to sweep.

A huge explosion rocks Soloman's River.  Jervis the Janitor enters Rajiv's Coffeehouse with his eardrum busted--the library has been destroyed and Mousy Librarian is missing!

In the "dead" section of an emergency triage room, a woman sits up, unzipping herself from a body bag.  Morris the Milquetoast braves the room, needing to find the body of Mousy Librarian.  He finds her, but this woman is quite alivedoesn't remember who she is...

• Where does the cavern lead and what will Yoongoong and Nurse do once they get there?
• Does Cilantro's mention of "turquoise" refer slyly to Doctor Turquoise, or is the color turquoise really an appropriate decorating choice for a castle?
• Did Cilantro lie about the baby?  If so, what happened, and where is Samantha?
• Who has Franny impregnated?  Why did she let him?
• What will Solomon's River do without a library?  Will there be more explosions?
• Will Morris tell Mousy who she is?  Will she ever remember on her own?  Are there other unforeseen consequences to being blown up?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!

Episode 45

Jervis the Janitor enters the library, freshly baked, to gawk at the mess of books thrown thoughtlessly on the floor.  He realizes all the books are about bombs and terrorists and that the man he had been toking with had mentioned bombs...  Mousy (the Librarian) is hiding in her book-walled bunker, fearful of the possible terrorist activities of Rude Guy.  Rude Guy reenters and Mousy runs away to call the NSA.  Just when Rude Guy is about to reveal the location of a possible bomb, Kahn, a talking monkey with a mysterious pointing fetish, interrupts.  Jervis thinks it must be his imaginary monkey, but Rude Guy can see it, too.  Jervis' much nicer imaginary monkey appears and they go to smoke together.

Dick Schmitch, famous property agent in Soloman's River, owns Kahn and wants him to "scope out" Rajiv's Coffee House so he can purchase it and turn it into a brothel.  Dick wants Kahn to assassinate Rajiv with a bomb and Kahn agrees.  A person, with possible bronchitis, responds to a want ad placed by Dick for his "entertainment brothel."  He will probably not be hired.

In Magnus' castle, his janitor is singing "O Sole Mio" in the bathroom, Lakshmi is still not there, and  Kahn shows up, unsure if Magnus is the one who should be killed.  Kahn believes he needs to kill "the brothel man," which is also not correct.  Kahn tells Magnus he's seen the princess and she is with "the brothel man" who looks like Magnus but is "a little bit smaller."  Then he points mysteriously.

Meanwhile, at the Soloman's River International Airport, Lakshmi tries to get her boarding pass via an unyielding kiosk only to be told that all flights out of Soloman's River have been cancelled due to an indeterminate threat.  Lakshmi is already frustrated because some guy tried to hire her for a brothel, and now she is stuck, for at least a few days, with everyone in Soloman's River.

Kahn enters and points.

• Who is the Rude Guy and why is he researching bombs?
• Why is there a talking monkey?
• Will Rajiv be displaced yet again, this time by a brothel with questionable entertainment?
• Does Magnus even know the extent of his own holdings?
• What will happen to Lakshmi, and all of Soloman's River, under Federal lockdown?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!

Episode 44

Dr. Turquoise and Dr. Scarlett begin this week's episode, preferring to remain in the comforts of the lair rather than the jungle looking for the escaped nurse.  Dr. Turquoise makes a proposal: combine their genius IQs to become a force with which to be reckoned.  Dr. Scarlett seems to agree, but calls "dibs" on the absent nurse, who must be kept quiet.

Magnus visits Rajiv's Coffee House without any new news about Princess Lakshmi.  Rajiv is despondent.  Mousy Librarian enters for her PMS tea, clearly pining for Morris the Milquetoast.  She is shocked to find out he is married (to a shrew!) and leaves to do "research."  Magnus leaves, directed by Rajiv to search his own (Magnus') castle.

In the castle, Magnus calls for an "Egyptian Princess."  He finds a janitor sweeping who confirms there are many Egyptian Princesses in this castle.  Two Egyptian Princesses--doing everything they can to be Egyptian--emerge.  Magnus mail-ordered them ten years ago, but forgot because it took so long for the currency exchange.  Princesses plot in Egyptian and pull Magnus into their clutches.

Mousy Librarian goes back to the library for her research.  Rude Guy is again searching the shelves and dumping books on the floor.  Mousy Librarian tries to be tough, but Rude Guy is so intimidating!  She calls "security"--the janitor, Jervis--who invites Rude Guy to go smoke a doobie and they leave, abandoning Mousy Librarian to clean up the mess.  Horror sets in as Mousy Librarian discovers Rude Guy had been browsing books from the "Terrorist Shelf."

• Will Dr. Turquoise and Dr. Scarlett become a full-fledged Evil Genius Duo?
• Will Nurse continue to evade capture?
• What will happen if Mrs. Rajiv returns to find her husband pining for a princess?
• What will the Egyptian Princesses do to Magnus that won't gross them out?
• Has Mousy Librarian discovered a nefarious plot?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!

Episode 43

We begin in the quiet of the library where a rude patron browses the shelves.  A stressed-out librarian follows him, trying and failing to keep order.  A milquetoast man enters, searching for the self-help section.  Stress overcomes the librarian who flees to her office to cry and Mister Milquetoast finds no help from Mister Rude.  Overbearing Wife of Mister Milquetoast (Morris) storms in and berates Morris for ignoring her bunions, mocks him for wanting a book, and tells him not to bother coming home.

At Rajiv's Coffee House, Rajiv is polishing his counter top (no quotes) when Magnus Adverson enters.  Ravij is down because his kidnapped princess has run away.  Magnus offers help.  Morris enters believing he could help, but has mistaken a Princess of India for a stray cat.  Stressed-Out Librarian is trying to calm herself with a cup of herbal tea when she recognizes Morris from the library and she apologizes for being rude.  She runs away, coughing.  She sneezes water into the hallway.  She closets herself in the ladies room to cough and blow her nose.

On a "deserted" island, Dr. Scarlett is discussing the runaway nurse with Dr. Turquoise and they agree she was very good at running away and not being found.  Dr. Scarlett revises his description of his nurse from "gangly" to "buxom," which is much more appropriate.

Meanwhile, somewhere else on the island, Nurse must pull the heel off of one shoe to match the other that has already broken.  While on the ground, Nurse notices prints on the jungle floor: bare foot prints with a strange drag line in between.  Drums beat as she follows the prints to the feet of a proud Native who does not speak English.  They bridge the language barrier with much pointing and grunting.  The nurse learns the native's name is Yoongoong, and Yoongoong learns how to say, "Nurse."  Nurse speaks slowly about the "baaad mehhhhn" and hopes he can help her escape.  As they are leaving, Dr. Turquoise sees them and readies the tranquilizer darts.  Nurse and Yoongoong run...

• Why was Mister Rude messing up the young librarian's Dewey Decimal System?
• Will Morris Milquetoast continue to be a doormat, find enough spine to leave his wife, or simply snap?
• Will Magnus be able to help Rajiv find Princess Lakshmi?
• Will Dr. Scarlett join forces with Dr. Turquoise to find his nurse?
• What does Nurse find so appealing about Yoongoong?  Will they outrun Dr. Turquoise and his minions?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!

Episode 42

In the basement of Rajiv's Coffee House, Rajiv discusses Lakshmi's feelings for him, and finally agrees to let her out once she has promised not to run away from him.  Once out of the basement, she runs away from him.

Meanwhile, at INTERPOL headquarters Agent Blakely is still locked in the cell.  His boss finally lets him out and takes him to discuss his future.

On the deserted island, Dr Scarlett awakes to find himself face-to-face with Dr Turquoise, from England.  Turquoise tells Scarlett he is part of an experiment...his nurse is on the other side of the 2-way glass, and if he pushes the red button, she will die.  Before he finishes explaining this, however, Scarlett presses the button.  Fortunately, Turquoise's assistant arrives and reports she has not yet put the nurse in the room because she has escaped.

Across town, Mandy and Sandy are sewing together "flesh suits" with a friend.

• Will the princess return?
• What will happen to Agent Blakely?
• Will the nurse get off the island?
• Why are these women sewing flesh suits?

Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!