Rajiv keeps testing Lakshmi's sudden super strength, and Lakshmi keeps testing Rajiv to find his super power. It's not mind reading. It's not flying. It's not hovering. It's not immunity to pain. Lakshmi uses her super strength to pick him up and run him back to Rajiv's Coffee House so he may meditate on the possibilities.
Bartholomew and Cletus argue as brothers do who are hungry, stuck in the forest, and tied together. Bartholomew knocks the treesagna out of Cletus' hands and they argue about saving the girl or not. Cletus stands firm about going home. Bartholomew relents, as his brother is much bigger, and they head home, hoping the girl (who is Sally) will either find her own way, or at least distract the wolves plaguing this part of the forest.
Meanwhile, in a hallway outside the fifth grade classroom a frock of girls gossips about Jeremy with the Beard! One thinks it's gross, but the more developed girl thinks it's hot. Jeremy himself walks by and says, "What's up, Sara?" causing Sara to lose it like a fangirl. She's positive Jeremy will now ask her to the Fifth Grade Dinner Dance--as long as Loser Myrtle isn't there. Nobody likes her and Sara teases a plan for a prank to her scheming friends.
Friendly neighborhood barber Bobby McMasterfaster is a little lonely in his shop, hoping business will pick up soon when the bell rings optimistically. Unfortunately, it's not a customer; it's a Born-Again Christian asking if he's found his personal Savior in Jesus Christ. A blade flashes, the blood flows, and the Born-Again confesses with her dying breath she didn't really believe. Bobby laughs and laughs...
- Will meditation help Rajiv find his zombie-inoculation-induced superpower?
- Will Bartholomew and Cletus find their way home in the wolf-infested woods?
- What has become of Sally?
- Will Jeremy ask Sara to the Dinner Dance?
- What is the prank Sara wants to pull on Loser Myrtle?
Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make it all up in, Solomon's River!
Bobby McMasterfaster, new to the bustling Solomon's River and still happy-go-lucky and full of hope, looks to rent a storefront for his new barber shop. Landlord Sean and his harpy wife agree to rent to him because they need the money.
Elsewhere, the Princess Evaleene is holding an audience for her supplicants who are ready to do her bidding. After dancing and meditation, Princess Evaleene glows and springs extra arms! The devotees praise her and ask instructions. An unusually deep voice emanates from the Princess, "You must bring me the child!" Which child? "Tuesday's child!" They promise to do her bidding as she flies off, mysteriously.
At Mason Brothers Moving Company, Franny Mason's employee, Tripp, has gotten word that his mother may have been packed away in one of the boxes from the former bar, The Dead Canary. They leave to check, but do not know they are too late, because...
...in a truck headed far, far from Solomon's River, a woman with a thick foreign accent awakes to find herself in a box. The woman, Tripp's mother and minion Angelica, doesn't know that her rival, Uber Minion, is the driver! After he leaves to pee at a rest stop, she digs out her emergency box cutter. Angelica just manages to roll open and closed the truck's rear door when Uber Minion returns from the bathroom. As he drives away with her gripping the back of the truck, she swears she will get him when next he has to pee.
Young, giggly Lindsey Makesweaty has trouble learning how to sweep, but patient barber Bobby McMasterfaster hires her anyway. A mother enters with her extremely bearded twelve year old son. She wants it off, immediately; however, the youngster's beard is tougher to remove than is anticipated. Lindsey tries using the broom, but only manages to knock the poor, hairy kid unconscious. Three hours of clipping, razoring, and depilating have proven futile. The mother jumps to the conclusion that it must be anabolic steroids, but she doesn't know that the previous day, her as-yet beardless boy went to Brendeesha Scarf's laboratory, wanting to become the Coolest Kid in School. Unethically, she gives him the anti-zombie (pro-superhero) potion.
Meanwhile, in the Solomon's River fifth grade girl's bathroom, a nameless snob and Allison, the coolest girl in the whole school who also has boobs, shun Stinky Marsha, discuss fifth grade boys, and wish those same boys were older. A geeky kid asks to use the bathroom, as he's not feeling well.
Princess Lakshmi has discovered her powers are increasing and she shows Rajiv by lifting a VW bus. She posits that the anti-zombie-ism potion they took may also have given Rajiv super strength. He tries to lift the Volkswagen, but his power is definitely not strength.
- Will Bobby McMasterfaster's barber shop hold up under the hope-drain that is Solomon's River?
- Who is "Tuesday's child" and what does Princess Evaleene want with him or her?
- Where is Uber Minion taking Angelica, and will she be able to take him down?
- Will Angelica's son Tripp discover she has been minion-napped?
- How many people has Brendeesha Scarf dosed with potions?
- What will become of the Soft-but-Tough-Beard Boy?
- Are Princess Lakshmi's powers permanent?
- What is Rajiv's power?
- Does the potion even inoculate against zombie-ism?
Find out the answers to these questions and more as we make
it all up in, Solomon's River!
